We are all familiar with a -
Herd of cows, A Flock of chickens, A School of fish And a Gaggle of geese. However, less widely known is: A Pride of lions, A Murder of crows (as well as their cousins the rooks and ravens), An Exaltation of doves And, presumably because they look so wise: A Parliament of owls.
Now consider a group of Baboons. They are the loudest, most dangerous, most obnoxious, most viciously aggressive and least intelligent of all primates. And what is the proper collective noun for a group of baboons?
Believe it or not... A Congress!
(Note: I hadn't heard that before, so I looked it up. It is correct)
A CONGRESS OF BABOONS!
You just can’t make this stuff up.
In a criminal justice system based on 12 individuals not smart enough to get out of jury duty, here is the exception:
A defendant was on trial for murder. There was strong evidence indicating guilt, but there was no corpse.
In the defense's closing statement, the lawyer, knowing that his client would probably be convicted, resorted at the last minute to a trick.
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I have a surprise for you all," the Lawyer said as he looked at his watch. "Within one minute, the person presumed dead in this case will walk into this courtroom." He looked toward the courtroom door. The jurors, somewhat stunned, all looked on eagerly. A minute passed. Nothing happened.
Finally the lawyer said, "Actually, I made up the previous statement. But you all looked on with anticipation. I put it to you that you have a reasonable doubt in this case as to whether anyone was killed and therefore I suggest that you have no option but to return a verdict of not guilty."
The jury retired to deliberate. In only a few minutes, the jury returned and pronounced a verdict of guilty.
"But how?" inquired the lawyer. "You must have had some doubt. I saw all of you stare at the door."
The jury foreman replied:
"Yes, we did look at the door, but your client didn't."
LAW OF QUEUE: If you change ur queue, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
LAW OF TELEPHONE: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.
LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
LAW OF WORKSHOP: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
BATH THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telefone rings.
LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone u know increases when u r with sum1 u don't want to b seen with. :P