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Once upon a time leadership mattered, now dealership rules the world.
Once upon a time quality was craftsman's pride, now it is a departmental mess.
Once upon a time mouse was an untouchable mammal, now it is handheld pest.
Once upon a time wisdom was cultivated by wise people, now it is flashed on T-shirts.
Once upon a time teacher tought and students learnt, now teacher trade and students consume.
Once upon a time population was a problem, now it is a flourishing mass market.
Once upon a time competition brought out the best, now it brings out the worst in people.
Once upon a time there was a golden rule, now if you have gold, you rule.
Once upon a time truth telling was good for your soul, now it is bad for promotion.
Once upon a time success meant living by ideals, now it is about using above all principles.
Once upon a time beauty was in the eye of the beholder, now it is booming business.
Once upon a time the government was clean and s#x was dirty, now one doesn't know.
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There were two nuns...
One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM), and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL).
It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.
SM:Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.
SL:It's logical. He wants to r#pe us.
SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the most! What can we do?
SL:The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.
SM:It's not working.
SL:Of course it's not working. The man did the only logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.
SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.
SL:The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and I'll go this way. He cannot follow us both.
So the man decided to follow Sister Logical.
Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is worried about what has happened to Sister Logical.
Then Sister Logical arrives.
SM:Sister Logical! Thank God you are here! Tell me what happened!
SL: The only logical thing happened. The man couldn't follow us both, so he followed me
SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?
SL: The only logical thing happened. I started to run as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.
SL: The only logical thing happened. He reached me
SM: Oh, dear! What did you do?
SL: The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.
SM: Oh, Sister! What did the man do?
SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.
SM:Oh, no! What happened then?
SL: Isn't it logical, Sister? A nun with her dress up can run faster than man with his pants down.You may also like to read -
Wife wanted, must be able to dig, clean, cook worms and clean fish. Must have own boat with motor. Please send photograph of motorboat.
Once in a lifetime offer, to get yourself the original, genuine article. One of the most handsome and smartest bachelor's around is now looking for a wife. And you could be the lucky one he chooses! Has own house, car and successful career!
I am in demand of a wife. Supply is great though my requirements are high. However the Elasticity of my demands should not bear too heavy a burden upon the national interest.
Wife required to complete the formula of my life. Must be numerate and understand complex algebraic logarithms. Needed to help further my family unit.
Well there is definite room for improvement in my life. The speed of my current flows of information and processes is slowing down and the injection of a wife into my life is bound to improve efficiency. Compatibility could be an issue.
Wife wanted for company.
I feel there is a need in this world, to improve the ways we live, to harmonize the processes of life and to build upon past differences and short comings. I believe that we the people need someone to share our lives. To feel the joys of parent hood, and bear the social responsibilities, as we should in a civilized society................. (etc etc and never getting to the point)
Wanted a sturdy, reliable, low depreciating wife. Should be in excellent working condition.
Wanted a wife from good stock. Required for breading.
I hereby propose to solicit myself as an eligible candidate for the post of wife after marriage. The person whom I'm looking for should be strictly -a girl. The girl should be strictly a girl, with evidence to support this view that she is a girl. The girl should be willing to surrender to the service and jurisdiction of My Lord i.e. Myself. Any objections would be overruled a! nd will not be sustained. Apply in limited confidence as all liabilities are null and void in the event of failure on our part of any kind whatsoever.
Wife required to complete my life. Please only level headed applicants. She must not have her heads in the clouds, but have her feet firmly on the ground. Her heart must be in it for the long haul. And she absolutely must also be aerodynamically sound!!!
Wanted wife who takes interest in me and credits me with her service.
Burri muddat keh baad eik arazoo jaagi hai, Key hum bee shaadi shooda ho jaayeh, Kya bahaana shaadi karaney ka............... joh kurrey sarey sarey, Yeah mai butaatah hoon ....... Kyoon key yaroo ub khud ghur keh kaam hotah nahee sarey sarey.
Required a girl - 5'8' & 36' 24' 36' with a good head for figures. She must be averse to making unnecessary expenditure and her very nature should be one of generating as few expenses in my life as possible. She should profit from a nice personality and be a credit to her family.
Wanted a girl. Girl's father should preferably have a drinks factory. I am an occasional alcoholic who drinks only when friends come round. Friends come round only seven times a week. Girl preferred who can carry me from bar to ghar-bar. Meet personally in a bar or send drinks for trial. Sample should be ample.
Hello! Hello! number 9 calling. This is number 9 I'm calling from x-ud,erm a wife is needed for pick me up. Driving license not necessary, but map reading skills are a bonus.
Allah kay naam peh koi eik biwi dey dey, Doosrey kee nahi to upni hee dey dey, Allah terah bullah kurrey, Tujhey eik key balley doh dey dey, Hillery hogi toh Monika bhi dey dey!
Wanted a wife to help build upon the foundations of my life. Must be homely and willing to build relationship from the ground up.
I am looking for a wife to cure the emptiness in my life. However if you feel the need for a second opinion then it's fine by me.
My mission in life is to find myself the perfect wife. Successful applicants must be able to use a penknife and a compass. She who dares wins. Camouflage provided.
RACE CAR DRIVER
A model wife required to fit in with my fast track life. Must be able to keep pace!
I'm searching for a wife to fill the space in my life. Someone to share my universe. Must have looks that are out of this world!
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A man and a woman, who had never met before, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, the two were tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper bunk and she in the lower.
At 2:00 AM, he leaned over and gently wakes the woman, saying, ?? "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be kind enough to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, why don't we pretend that we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!!" he is excited.
"Good," she replies. "Get up and get your own damn blanket."
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Believe in yourself and in your dream
though impossible things may seem,
Someday, somehow you'll get through to
the goal you have in view.
Mountains fall and seas divide before
the one who in his stride.
Takes a hard road day by day
sweeping obstacles away.
Believe in yourself and in your plan.
Say not - I cannot but, I can.
The prizes of life we fail to win,
because we doubt the power within!
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