As Jane serves "roast pork" for dinner, John comments on how "delicious" it looks but has been wondering for a long time why Jane cuts off both ends of the pork.
She ask her, "well dear" replies Jane, "I have always watched my mother do it when I was growing up and therefore cannot answer why this has to be done, however I shall ask her why when I speak with her next"
Later that evening Jane calls her mother to ask. After a short silent pause, the mother replies "Well dear, I have always watched your grandmother prepare the roast pork this way, therefore maybe you should ask her"
By this time curiosity has got the better of Jane and she calls her grandmother almost immediately....
"Grandma, why do you cut off both ends of the roast pork when preparing it" ask Jane. "is this to make it taste better"
Her Grandma replies "well Jane, as far as I can remember the reason I done that was because I could not fit the pork into my cooking pot otherwise"
The moral of the story is that we as a society seem to do things almost instinctively or automatically without knowing the actual real historical reason behind them.
According to the school of "transactional analysis" we always seem to associate such messages from our childhood days and therefore the "drivers" coming from our parents and ancestors both influence and orient our actions throughout our lives and as if it has been "thrust" into the values we all hold as "a highest priority" influence directly to these orders.
But who for example, is capable of always doing everything perfectly? No one is! So statements such as "be perfect" is therefore a message which is terribly constraining on the human mind.
It creates strong internal tension in both us as individuals and society as a whole. This in turn affects the way we communicate towards each other.
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