Reachout Blogs: September 2011

What goes Around usually comes Around

This is a true story that had happened in 1892 at Stanford University. Its moral is still relevant today.

A young, 18 year old student was struggling to pay his fees. He was An orphan, and not knowing where to turn for money, he came up with a bright idea. A friend and he decided to host a musical concert on Campus to raise money for their education.

They reached out to the great pianist Ignacy J. Paderewski. His Manager demanded a guaranteed fee of $2,000 for the piano recital. A Deal was struck. And the boys began to work to make the concert a Success.

The big day arrived. Paderewski performed at Stanford. But Unfortunately, they had not managed to sell enough tickets. The Total collection was only $1,600. Disappointed, they went to Paderewski and explained their plight. They gave him the entire $1,600, plus a cheque for the balance of $400. They promised to Honor the cheque soonest possible.

"No" said Paderewski. "This is not acceptable" He tore up the Cheque, returned the $1,600 and told the boys "Here's the $1,600. Please deduct whatever expenses you have incurred. Keep the money You need for your fees. And just give me whatever is left" The boys Were surprised, and thanked him profusely.

It was a small act of kindness. But it clearly marked out Paderewski As a great human being.

Why should he help two people he did not Even know?

We all come across situations like these in our lives. And most of us only think "If I help them, what would happen to me?"

The truly great people think, "If I don't help them, what will Happen to them?" They don't do it expecting something in return. They do it because they feel it's the right thing to do.

Paderewski later went on to become the Prime Minister of Poland. He Was a great leader, but unfortunately when the World War began, Poland was ravaged. There were over 1.5 million people starving in His country, and no money to feed them.

Paderewski did not know where to turn for help. He reached out to The US Food and Relief Administration for help.

The head was a man called Herbert Hoover - who later went on to Become the US President. Hoover agreed to help and quickly shipped Tons of food grains to fee the starving Polish people. A calamity Was averted.

Paderewski was relieved. He decided to go across to meet Hoover and Personally thank him. When Paderewski began to thank Hoover for his Noble gesture, Hoover quickly interjected and said, "You shouldn't Be thanking me, Mr. Prime Minister. You may not remember this, but Several years ago, you helped two young students go through college In the US. I was one of them."

Contributed by: asharaj53 @ gmail.com

Minimize Your Fear

1. What is the worst that could happen?

I like this very practical exercise as step number one.

So ask yourself this question. Really think about. Don't just think about it for a few seconds. Sit down with a pen and piece of paper, your laptop or cellphone. Write it all out and think about what the realistic worst-case scenario would be.

Then write down a plan for how you can come back from such a scenario.
This step brings clarity, defuses fuzzy fears and helps you realize that you can most often bounce back pretty quickly even if the worst-case scenario somehow becomes reality.

If that only works to a degree move on to the next step

2. Share your fear with someone.

By sharing your fear you can relieve inner pressure. By just keeping it on the inside it's easy to build it up into this massive nightmare and extremely dangerous thing.

By sharing and by getting some input from a levelheaded friend or family member he or she can help you to alleviate the fear and inner pressure. And you can gain a much healthier perspective on things again.

If you don't have someone to share it with or if that only works partly too then move on to

3. Accept the fear.

It is a natural impulse to try to deny the fear when shows up in your life. Perhaps you try to not think about, you try to push it away. Or you tell yourself that you need to focus like a laser beam on the positive.

I have found that in many cases it is actually better to just accept that fear or whatever is left of it after having worked through step #1 and #2 – is here right now (although it can be hard to sometimes convince your brain that this is a good option as it wants to deny or reject what is).

By accepting that you feel this way you stop feeding more energy into the fear and you stop making it strong. After a few minutes of fully taking in this uncomfortable feeling and accepting it then it starts to lose steam. It just seems to float away and you feel more open and relieved feelings bubbling up within.

4. Tap into curiosity and focus on the upsides.

By now, most of those fearful feelings are often pretty small and they tend come and go. You have processed much of that inner tension and resistance.

So you are now at a good point to start focusing on why you want to move towards what you have feared and to open your mind to what you can find out there.

Take out the pen and paper and ask yourself:

What is the opportunity in this situation?
What are the potential upsides I want and can have by taking these actions?
What are the potential upsides in one year if I start moving on this path? And in five years?
And how will life be in five years if I continue on the path I am now?

The answer when it comes to what you eat for lunch or if you want to have a new hobby may simply be that life becomes more fun, healthy, fulfilling and filled with newness and more surprises.

The answer when it comes to taking action to make a date happen, to get a new job or to take another direction in college could be that your life changes completely.

5. Take a small step forward. Take it slowly if you like.

You don't have to go all in at once in many cases. Think about how you can move in small steps and slowly towards what you want. Just dip your toes in at first if that feels more comfortable. The most important thing is that you start moving and that you take action, not how fast or how much action you take at first.

If you for example want to start your own business work on that in the evening while still working at your day job or staying in school. Don't let thinking like "I have to go all in and take huge risks" hold you back.

Or if you want to try something new today just tell yourself that:

Just for today I will try [insert something you want to try]!

You just have to do it today. Not ever again after today. You are not signing up for some huge commitment.

Tomorrow you may continue on that new path. Or you may not.

By not making this into a huge thing you have do but instead just a small step, that you can take and get done as slowly as you like, it becomes so much easier to do what is most important at first: to put yourself in motion.

Then, along the way, you can take bigger leaps if you like and speed things up. You will learn through successes and failures (and realize that you won't die if things don't go your way all the time). You will quit some things and continue doing other things.

But first, make it easy on yourself to take the first step.

Contributed by: asharaj53 @ gmail.com

Deft & Daft Definitions

ATOM BOMB:
An invention to bring an end to all inventions

BOSS:
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early

CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!

CLASSIC:
A book which people praise, but never read

COMMITTEE:
Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together

COMPROMISE:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece

CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present

CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on

CRIMINAL:
A guy no different from the other, unless he gets caught

DICTIONARY:
A place where divorce comes before marriage

DIPLOMAT:
A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip

DOCTOR:
A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by his bills!

ECSTASY:
A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before

ETC:
A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do

EXPERIENCE:
The name men give to their Mistakes

FATHER:
A banker provided by nature

LECTURE:
An art of transmitting Information from the notes of the lecturer
to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either

MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

MISER:
A person who lives poor so that he can die RICH!

OFFICE:
A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life

OPPORTUNIST:
A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river

OPTIMIST:
A person who while falling from EIFFEL TOWER says in midway "SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"

PESSIMIST:
A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in OPPORTUNITY

PHILOSOPHER:
A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead

POLITICIAN:
One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence Later

SMILE:
A curve that can set a lot of things straight!

TEARS:
The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water-power!

YAWN:
The only time when some married men ever get to open their mouth

Contributed by: asharaj53 @ gmail.com

High Expectations

It was professor smith's first day at St. Johns medical college as a faculty. Known for his teaching excellence,
he made his entry into a classroom of 1st year medical students, where he received a warm welcome from the students, followed by their intro.

To start with, he planned to put forth a question to the class. He said, "Well students, before we start off with today's lecture, let me ask you a simple question on human anatomy".

He gazed across the classroom, spotted a female student Suzie, and said, "Tell me Suzie, which part of the human body grows 10 times its original size when excited?"

Hearing this question, Suzie's face grew pale in embarrassment, she replied:" you should be ashamed to ask such a question to a female. I am sorry, but I can't answer your, this question".

Thwarted by the girl's reply, professor smith rolled on his sight around the classroom afresh, to find out if there was anyone else who could satisfy his query.

This time he located a male student Henry, who had already raised his hand in affirmation to answer the question, and allowed the lad to go ahead.

Henry answered: "pupil of a human eye".

The professor applauded for the boy's accurate answer; then turned back to Suzie and said: "look, Suzie, I am sorry but, I must tell you a couple of things:

(1) You lack knowledge

(2) You have a dirty mind and

(3) Your Expectations are too high !!! (10 times ... ... Huh ... ... MY GOD !!!

Contributed by: ureshmallikarjunappa @ gmail.com

Common Sense

An Obituary in the London Times.....

Absolutely Brilliant !!!

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who
has been with us for many years.

No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long
ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:-

Knowing when to come in out of the rain;- Why the early bird gets the
worm;- Life isn't always fair;- and maybe it was my fault. Common Sense
lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can
earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but
overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy
charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate;
teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch;
and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened
his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the
job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly
children. It declined even further when schools were required to get
parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student;
but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted
to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses;
and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a
burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to
realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in
her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by
his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son,
Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers: I Know My Rights I
Want It Now Someone Else Is To Blame I'm A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone.

The Wooden Bowl

I guarantee you will remember the tale of the Wooden Bowl tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now, a year from now.

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year old grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered.

The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon and onto the floor. When he grasped the glass milk spilled on the tablecloth.

The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.

"We must do something about oldfather", said the son. "I've had enough of spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor." So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner.

Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl. When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone.

Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he had dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old watched it all in silence.

One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child curiously, "What are you making?"

Sweetly, the boy responded, "Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up." The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.

The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.

That evening, the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, when milk was spilled, or when the tablecloth was soiled.

On a positive note, I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.

I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.

I've learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone. People love that human touch - holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.

I've learned that no matter what happens or how bad it seems today, life goes on, and it will be better tomorrow.

I've learned that, regardless of your relationship with your parents, you will miss them when they are gone from your life.

I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and a late friend.

I've learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a life.

I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others, your work, and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you.

I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back.

I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.

The Tao of Forgiveness

One day, a sage gave his disciple an empty sack and a basket of potatoes. 'Think of all the people who have done or said something against you in the recent past, especially those you cannot forgive.

For each of them, inscribe the name on a potato and put it in the sack.'

The disciple came up quite a few names, and soon his sack was heavy with potatoes.

'Carry the sack with you wherever you go for a week,' said the sage. 'We'll talk after that.'

At first, the disciple thought nothing of it. Carrying the sack was not particularly difficult. But after a while, it became more of a burden. It sometimes got in the way, and it seemed to require more effort to carry as time went on, even though its weight remained the same.

After a few days, the sack began to smell. The carved potatoes gave off a ripe odor. Not only were they increasingly inconvenient to carry around, they were also becoming rather unpleasant.

Finally, the week was over. The sage summoned the disciple.

'Any thoughts about all this?'

'Yes, Master,' the disciple replied. 'When we are unable to forgive others, we carry negative feelings with us everywhere, much like these potatoes. That negativity becomes a burden to us and, after a while, it festers.'

'Yes, that is exactly what happens when one holds a grudge. So, how can we lighten the load?'

'We must strive to forgive.'

'Forgiving someone is the equivalent of removing the corresponding potato from the sack. How many of your transgressors are you able to forgive?'

'I've thought about it quite a bit, Master,' the disciple said. 'It required much effort, but I have decided to forgive all of them.'

'Very well, we can remove all the potatoes. Were there any more people who transgressed against you this last week?'

The disciple thought for a while and admitted there were.

Then he felt panic when he realized his empty sack was about to get filled up again.

'Master,' he asked, 'if we continue like this, wouldn't there always be potatoes in the sack week after week?'

'Yes, as long as people speak or act against you in some way, you will always have potatoes.'

'But Master, we can never control what others do. So what good is the Tao in this case?'

'We're not at the realm of the Tao yet. Everything we have talked about so far is the conventional approach to forgiveness. It is the same thing that many philosophies and most religions preach - we must constantly strive to forgive, for it is an important virtue. This is not the Tao because there is no striving in the Tao.'

'Then what is the Tao, Master?'

'You can figure it out. If the potatoes are negative feelings, then what is the sack?'

'The sack is... that which allows me to hold on to the negativity. It is something within us that makes us dwell on feeling offended.... Ah, it is my inflated sense of self-importance. '

'And what will happen if you let go of it?'

'Then... the things that people do or say against me no longer seem like such a major issue.'

'In that case, you won't have any names to inscribe on potatoes. That means no more weight to carry around, and no more bad smells.

The Tao of forgiveness is the conscious decision to not just to remove some potatoes... but to relinquish the entire sack.'

The Falcon

Once there was a king who received a gift of two magnificent falcons from Arabia. They were peregrine falcons, the most beautiful birds he had ever seen. He gave the precious birds to his head falconer to be trained.

Months passed and one day the head falconer informed the king that though one of the falcons was flying majestically, soaring high in the sky, the other bird had not moved from its branch since the day it had arrived.

The king summoned healers and sorcerers from all the land to tend to the falcon, but no one could make the bird fly. He presented the task to the member of his court, but the next day, the king saw through the palace window that the bird had still not moved from its perch. Having tried everything else, the king thought to himself, "May be I need someone more familiar with the countryside to understand the nature of this problem." So he cried out to his court, "Go and get a farmer."

In the morning, the king was thrilled to see the falcon soaring high above the palace gardens. He said to his court, "Bring me the doer of this miracle."

The court quickly located the farmer, who came and stood before the king. The king asked him, "How did you make the falcon fly?"

With head bowed, the farmer said to the king, " It was very easy, your highness. I simply cut the branch where the bird was sitting."

We are all made to fly - to realize our incredible potential as human beings. But instead of doing that, we sit on our branches, clinging to the things that are familiar to us. The possibilities are endless, but for most of us, they remain undiscovered. We conform to the familiar, the comfortable, the mundane. So for the most part, our lives are mediocre instead of exciting, thrilling and fulfilling. So let us learn to destroy the branch of fear we cling to and free ourselves to the glory of flight.

Contributed by: gopinathan.kp @ genlite.in

Health Benefits of Cardamom

Cardamom herb or cumin cardamom is referred to as the Queen of spices and is popularly referred to as cardamom / elaichi in India and the Indian subcontinent. Apart from its aromatic fragrance used for flavoring foods, cardamom uses range from it being a digestive system tonic to an essential oil in aroma therapy. Here are some Cardamom has a strong, unique taste, with an intensely aromatic, resinous fragrance. Black cardamom has a distinctly more smoky, though not bitter, aroma with a coolness some consider similar to mint.

Health benefits of cardamom / Elachi

· Cardamom fights against gas. It helps to relieve gas and heart burn.

· Cardamom gives instant relief from the headache. (Applying the paste over forehead gives the relief.)

· Cardamom is useful for the protection against heat stroke. One should chew a cardamom while going outside home in sun.

· Aromatic cardamom acts as breath freshener because of its fragrance.

· Cardamom is very good refinement spice against caffeine. (Detoxifies caffeine).

· Helpful in balancing all the three doshas that's why termed as "tridoshic"Little quantity of cardamom is beneficial in balancing kapha".

· Useful in various kinds of respiratory disorders. In sore throat beneficial.

· Cardamom also helps in asthma and whooping-cough. Make a paste by adding cardamom powder and honey.

· Regular use of this mixture will give you relief from asthma and whooping-cough.

· Cardamom has very good anti-spasmodic abilities so it is very helpful in stopping spasms and tremors.

· Cardamom helps in the stimulation and regulation process of discharge of gastric juices and balances stomach acids.

· Cardamom helps greatly to cure teeth gum and tooth infections.

· Cardamom supports the detoxification process of the body and helps to filter the entire body.

· Cardamom is useful in the problems of urinating. You just have to eat cardamom added in to amla, curd, or honey.

· Cardamom warms the respiratory tract and by doing this, it increases the circulation to the lungs.

· It helps those suffering from stomach cramps (cardamom +long pepper clarified butter).

· Cardamom is a boon for vocalists as it helps in improving voice.

· It has some role in relieving hiccups.

· It is one of the antidepressant in Ayurveda.

· Good remedy in vomiting.

· Cardamom's aroma has encouraging effects on the nervous system. It gives healthy feelings during the period of weakness.

Contributed by: asharaj53 @gmail.com

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