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Advice from an Old American Farmer

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong.

* Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.

* Life is simpler when you plow around  the stump.

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered... not yelled.

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

* Forgive your enemies.  It messes up their heads.

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you. 

* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.

* Every path has a few puddles. 

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

* The best  sermons are lived, not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen, anyway.

* Don't judge folks by their relatives.

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer. 

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none.

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

 * The biggest troublemaker you'll  ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'.' 

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. 

* Live simply.  Love generously.  Care deeply.  Speak  kindly

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