Do You Need a Conditioner?

Contributed by: Ahmed Imam (idealimam @ yahoo.com)

Hair care tips come in all shapes and sizes. When one reads hair care information online or in a magazine, they are met with a wide array of answers when it comes to the proper hair care techniques. The problem with such general tips is that they are not provided for each individual specifically.

Since each individual has unique hair texture and qualities, it is hard to pinpoint whether a certain hair care tip will be applicable. This is true when it comes to hair conditioner. For those who want to find out if they need conditioner for their hair, the following will provide some insight in order to come up with a concrete answer when it comes to your particular situation.

Type of Hair

The first step to determining if you need a conditioner is to identify the type of hair which you have. This is a key factor in figuring out whether a conditioner is necessary. If one has dry hair, it is a good idea to use a conditioner on their hair every day. Since conditioner is a moisturizer for hair, using it on dry hair will make the hair more vibrant and manageable. On the other hand, if one has hair that is not at all dry and is quite manageable with just a shampoo, then a conditioner may not be needed.

Desired Style of Hair

An additional factor to consider when determining whether or not a conditioner is necessary is the desired style of hair which one is hoping to go with that day. For those who wish to keep their hair straight, using a conditioner will help in this regard. In the alternative, individuals who are going to put their hair in an updo or use a curling iron to curl their hair may want to think twice before opening up that conditioner bottle.

Using a regular amount of conditioner or too much conditioner on hair that is going to be styled or curled may make the finished product less satisfactory in the end. Therefore, it is important to note how one will be wearing their hair that day before they determine if conditioner is needed.

How Your Hair Reacts to Conditioner

It is also important to note how one's hair reacts to the use of conditioner. If using conditioner on a daily basis does not reach the desired outcome, then perhaps using shampoo alone is the best bet. On the other hand, if using the conditioner results in the best final product, then using conditioner every day is the way to go.

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The science of sleep

Contributed by: Ahmed Imam (idealimam @ yahoo.com)

We spend a third of our lives doing it.

Napoleon, Florence Nightingale and Margaret Thatcher got by on four hours a night.

Thomas Edison claimed it was waste of time.

Why do we sleep?

So why do we sleep? This is a question that has baffled scientists for centuries and the answer is, no one is really sure. Some believe that sleep gives the body a chance to recuperate from the day's activities but in reality, the amount of energy saved by sleeping for even eight hours is miniscule - about 50 kCal, the same amount of energy in a piece of toast.

We have to sleep because it is essential to maintaining normal levels of cognitive skills such as speech, memory, innovative and flexible thinking. In other words, sleep plays a significant role in brain development.

What would happen if we didn't sleep?

A good way to understand the role of sleep is to look at what would happen if we didn't sleep. Lack of sleep has serious effects on our brain's ability to function. If you've ever pulled an all-nighter, you'll be familiar with the following after-effects: grumpiness, grogginess, irritability and forgetfulness. After just one night without sleep, concentration becomes more difficult and attention span shortens considerably.

With continued lack of sufficient sleep, the part of the brain that controls language, memory, planning and sense of time is severely affected, practically shutting down. In fact, 17 hours of sustained wakefulness leads to a decrease in performance equivalent to a blood alcohol level of 0.05% (two glasses of wine). This is the legal drink driving limit in the UK.

Research also shows that sleep-deprived individuals often have difficulty in responding to rapidly changing situations and making rational judgements. In real life situations, the consequences are grave and lack of sleep is said to have been be a contributory factor to a number of international disasters such as Exxon Valdez, Chernobyl, Three Mile Island and the Challenger shuttle explosion.

Sleep deprivation not only has a major impact on cognitive functioning but also on emotional and physical health. Disorders such as sleep apnoea which result in excessive daytime sleepiness have been linked to stress and high blood pressure. Research has also suggested that sleep loss may increase the risk of obesity because chemicals and hormones that play a key role in controlling appetite and weight gain are released during sleep.

What happens when we sleep?

What happens every time we get a bit of shut eye? Sleep occurs in a recurring cycle of 90 to 110 minutes and is divided into two categories: non-REM (which is further split into four stages) and REM sleep.

Non-REM sleep

Stage one: Light Sleep

During the first stage of sleep, we're half awake and half asleep. Our muscle activity slows down and slight twitching may occur. This is a period of light sleep, meaning we can be awakened easily at this stage.

Stage two: True Sleep

Within ten minutes of light sleep, we enter stage two, which lasts around 20 minutes. The breathing pattern and heart rate start to slow down. This period accounts for the largest part of human sleep.

Stages three and four: Deep Sleep

During stage three, the brain begins to produce delta waves, a type of wave that is large (high amplitude) and slow (low frequency). Breathing and heart rate are at their lowest levels.

Stage four is characterised by rhythmic breathing and limited muscle activity. If we are awakened during deep sleep we do not adjust immediately and often feel groggy and disoriented for several minutes after waking up. Some children experience bed-wetting, night terrors, or sleepwalking during this stage.

REM sleep

The first rapid eye movement (REM) period usually begins about 70 to 90 minutes after we fall asleep. We have around three to five REM episodes a night.

Although we are not conscious, the brain is very active - often more so than when we are awake. This is the period when most dreams occur. Our eyes dart around (hence the name), our breathing rate and blood pressure rise. However, our bodies are effectively paralysed, said to be nature's way of preventing us from acting out our dreams.

After REM sleep, the whole cycle begins again.

How much sleep is required?

There is no set amount of time that everyone needs to sleep, since it varies from person to person. Results from the sleep profiler indicate that people like to sleep anywhere between 5 and 11 hours, with the average being 7.75 hours.

Jim Horne from Loughborough University's Sleep Research Centre has a simple answer though: "The amount of sleep we require is what we need not to be sleepy in the daytime."

The current world record for the longest period without sleep is 11 days, set by Randy Gardner in 1965. Four days into the research, he began hallucinating. This was followed by a delusion where he thought he was a famous footballer. Surprisingly, Randy was actually functioning quite well at the end of his research and he could still beat the scientist at pinball.

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The Unfolding Rose

A young preacher was walking with an older, more seasoned preacher in the garden one day. Feeling a bit insecure about what God had for him to do, he was asking the older preacher for some advice. The older preacher walked up to a rose bush and handed the young preacher a rosebud and told him to open it without tearing any of the petals. The young preacher looked in disbelief at the older preacher and was trying to figure out what a rosebud could possibly have to do with his wanting to know the will of God for his life and ministry. But, because of his great respect for the older preacher, he proceeded to try and unfold the rosebud while keeping every petal intact . . .

It wasn't long before he realized how impossible this was to do.

Noticing the young preacher's inability to unfold the rosebud without tearing it, the older preacher began to recite the following poem:

It is only a tiny rosebud

A flower of God's design;

But I cannot unfold the petals

With these clumsy hands of mine.

The secret of unfolding flowers

Is not known to such as I.

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GOD opens this flower so sweetly,

Then, in my hands, they die.

If I cannot unfold a rosebud,

The flower of God's design,

Then how can I have the wisdom

To unfold this life of mine?

So, I'll trust in Him for leading

Each moment of my day.

I will look to Him for His guidance

Each step of the Pilgrim's way.

The pathway that lies before me

Only my Heavenly Father knows.

I'll trust him to unfold the moments,

Just as He unfolds the rose.

 

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, and an entire lifetime to forget them. Send this message to the people you will never forget, and remember to also send it to the person who sent it to you. It's a short message to let them know that you'll never forget them...

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  • Choosing the Right Sunglasses

    Contributed by: verygood101 @ yahoo.com

    Proper sunglasses are most important during summer because it protects your eye from the harmful UV-rays that are the cause of blindness, cataracts etc.

    # Always look for sunglasses that block 99 or 100 percent of UV radiation thereby protecting your eyes.

    # Also see to it that the lenses are dark enough to filter out 75 to 90 percent of the powerful sunrays that makes you squint.

    # The lenses should not cause eyestrain, headache, and, give ugly wrinkles.

    # One way to ensure that the sunglasses will protect your eyes from harmful rays is to always put on your sunglasses and take a look in the mirror; if you can see your eyes, the lenses aren`t dark enough to screen out visible light.

    # Use colours of your lenses that will help you see the world`s true colour, like grey, brown, or green. Avoid yellow or amber lenses they make it hard to distinguish the traffic signal.

    # If you are buying plastic lenses then pick one that has a scratch-resistant coating.

    # Try to go for wraparound frames since they offer the most protection by blocking light from the sides, top, and bottom.

    # Go for frames that are strong, sturdy as well as light. Nylon or composite frames are light and strong; metal frames tend to be fashionable but are often heavy.

    Types of Sunglasses

    # Single-gradient lenses: these are permanently shaded from top to bottom, cut glare from above but allow you to see clearly below.

    # Double-gradient lenses are those, which are dark on the top and bottom and lighter in the middle.

    # Polarized lenses are also great for all these activities, since they block light reflected off smooth surfaces like water and pavement.

    # Photo chromic lenses, since they darken in bright light in about 30 seconds but take about five minutes to lighten up again in dimmer conditions.

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    HOW TO Stop Body Odor Naturally

    Contributed by: verygood101 @ yahoo.com

    Millions of people suffer from embarrassing body odor. Fortunately, you don't need to spend a lot to solve the problem. Natural, 'green', cheap baking soda can solve your personal odor issue!

    Instructions

    Step 1 - DEODORANT

    If your deodorant isn't able to stop body odor effectively for you, you don't have to buy a more expensive brand. Simply apply a slightly heavier coat of deodorant than normal. Then, apply baking soda on top of that layer, like you were applying baby powder. Be careful not to inhale baking soda. It's not toxic, but any lung contaminate can result in respiratory problems.

    Step 2 - BAD BREATH

    Try adding baking soda to your toothpaste, or purchase a toothpaste with baking soda as an ingredient. You can also mix half a teaspoon of baking soda with your mouthwash and use it to swish and gargle.

    Step 3 - HAIR

    Your hair traps odors and oils produced by your scalp. In fact, more body heat is released through your head than through any other part of your body. These oils not only look bad, but carry an unpleasant odor too.

    Try adding a touch of baking powder to your grooming routine. In the shower, after washing and conditioning, mix a small amount of baking soda (2 tbs approximately) with enough water to create a paste. Apply this paste to your hair and massage in thoroughly. Allow to sit for 3 minutes, then rinse. Your hair may feel slick even after rinsing. This is because a small amount of baking soda will cling to your hair, helping to absorb odors throughout your day.

    ***NOTE*** If you are in a situation where showering is not an option, baking soda can be applied directly to your hair and combed through for a similar effect. Do not mix the baking soda with any water. Again, be careful not to inhale baking soda.

    Step 4 - SHOES

    You are probably aware that baking soda is a common additive to innersoles and other shoe inserts. However, you don't need to purchase the insert to have the same odor fighting effects.

    Pour enough baking soda into your shoes to coat the inner sides. Spread the baking soda on all inner sides of the shoe as though you were coating a baking pan with flour. Allow soda several hours to absorb odors. Then, turn shoe upside down over a trash bin and pat with your hand to remove excess powder. Repeat as often as you need to keep up with foot odor.

    Step 5 - LAUNDRY

    Adding baking soda to your laundry will help stop body odor. This method works best with natural fibers like cotton, denim blue jeans, linen.

    WASH METHOD ~ Wash clothes as normal with regular detergent, but add 1/4 cup baking soda to the wash.

    DRYER METHOD ~ Wash clothes as usual. Moisten a clean washcloth, sprinkle with 2 tablespoons of baking soda. Add the washcloth to the load in your dryer. Dry as usual. ***This method works best for ongoing prevention of body odor***

    Step 6 - BATH

    There are many benefits to adding soaking in a a baking soda bath. It will help relieve skin irritation, moisten your skin, relieve itch. It will also help fight odor.

    Add 2 tablespoons of baking soda to a comfortably warm bath.

    Step 7 - HAND ODOR

    If you are one of many people who find that any odor your hands come in contact with is difficult to wash away, baking soda is the answer. Baking soda is highly effective in removing unpleasant smells like onion and garlic. Simply wet your hands, apply baking soda liberally, scrub, rinse. Odor is gone.

    Tips & Warnings

    - If skin irritation develops, discontinue use of baking soda.

    - If you have existing skin conditions, consult your doctor before using baking soda in any of the methods described in this article.

    - Do not expose eyes to baking soda.

    - Do not inhale baking soda.

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    HOW TO Fight BAD foot odor

    Contributed by: verygood101 @ yahoo.com

    More than half of men (and their wives and lady friends) complain about foot odor. Yes, some people have difficulty with fungus or bacteria production, but usually, people just don't wash them well enough, reasoning that "I'm standing in the shower, with soapy water running over my feet, that's good enough." Clearly not.

    With all the nooks and crannies, you simply don't get rid of odor-causing bacteria - and that is what causes odor. You brush your teeth every day – wash your feet.

    Most of you don't need special deodorizers or powders. Here are a few simple steps.

    Instructions

    Step 1 - First, scrub'em in the shower, tops and bottoms, with a bath brush preferably, a washcloth at least. You can try a deodorant soap, but the trick is to get rid of the odor-causing bacteria.

    Step 2 - Spend time on each foot, getting in between toes, hitting every surface. The rule of thumb for washing bacteria off hands is to wash for 30 seconds, or two verses of "Happy Birthday." Use three verses for your feet.

    Step 3 - Wear cotton, silk or wool socks, as much as possible. Synthetics don't breathe, and promote moisture and bacteria.

    Step 4 - Put a dash of baby powder, or talcum, or maybe Gold Bond powder in your shoes when you take them off. The powder absorbs the moisture from the day's wear, and from your feet the next time you wear them.

    Step 5 - Lastly, if you still get odor – use a simple spray deodorant. Spray deodorant works by inhibiting bacteria growth in your armpits, it will do the same for your feet. The specialized foot deodorants aren't usually necessary.

    You'll be surprised and delighted how well this works.

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  • Wardrobe for Men

    Contributed by: verygood101 @ yahoo.com

    When it comes to wardrobe & fashion, many guys don't realize that clothing does indeed "make the man." What you wear is just as important to others as to yourself.

    To be taken seriously in today's society, a first impression does matter -- significantly. If you want to be noticed favorably by both women and men, we've got some basic fashion and style tips to help you dress up to your potential.

    Keep in mind, even the most expensive clothing line won't flatter you if you slouch. Stand up straight and carry yourself with pride.. If you respect yourself, others will too.

    Wear Clothes that Fit

    Why not look good today, instead of some unspecified day in the future, when you gain or lose a few pounds -- and will it really happen? When you're shopping, buy clothes that are comfortable. If you need something altered, visit your tailor.

    Find out What Works for You

    Take a good look in the mirror and you'll begin to understand what colors and styles look the best on you. It's OK to try something new, but classics outlive trends.

    Maintain Your Clothing

    Don't wear soiled or wrinkled clothes. Stick to fabrics that resist wrinkling or learn how to use an iron. Suits and formal wear should be taken to the dry-cleaner to be cleaned and pressed.

    Stripes - Not the Best Choice

    It's best to stay away from horizontal stripes, unless your tall & lean. Most stripes are unflattering, and the horizontal ones add bulk, can make you appear heavier, and shorter. Solid colors are a good choice and dark, solids will make you look slimmer.

    Keep it Simple

    Loud, bright colors and patterns can make you look ridiculous. You can't go wrong with basic black and navy blue for work or casual, it's classic for a reason. You can add other attractive colors for a perfect match.

    Get Rid of Old Clothes

    Don't be stuck in the "good old days." If it's out of style, don't wear it anymore. If you can't imagine parting with it, store it. Trends run their cycles and you may once again be able to wear your favorite garments -- but only when they're popular.

    Keep Short Sleeves for Casual

    Don't show up for a job interview or business meeting in a short-sleeved shirt. Formal and business attire always include long sleeves and a tie.

    Men's Accessory Tips

    ·         Your belt and shoe color should match.

    ·         Make sure your shoes are comfortable.

    ·         Keep your shoes in tip-top shape by polishing them regularly.

    ·         A shoe tree will help keep less-worn shoes keep their shape.

    ·         Only lace-up shoes are appropriate with a suit. Save the boots for leisure.

    ·         Your socks should match your shoes..

    ·         Your tie should reach the top of your belt.

    ·         Wear a belt that fits. The prong should fit into one of the middle holes, not the first or last one.

    ·         Do not wear a belt AND suspenders at the same time.

    ·         Apply cologne before getting dressed to avoid any direct stains.

    ·         Remember, good posture adds height and self-confidence.

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  • The Blue Ribbon

    I sat in my seat on a cross country flight. As always, I was buried deep in my work in order to distract myself from the boring drone of the engines and to take me mentally away from the mundane nature of yet another air plane trip.

    As I sat there I could not help but over-hear the conversation taking place behind me between a father and his son. What a beautiful exchange. The father was explaining the wing of the aircraft and the physics of lift. The conversation continued for almost the entire flight. What struck me was not the content of the conversation but the fact that this father was actively participating in the experience of life with his son. What a beautiful relationship and expression of a fathers love. Moreover, the distinction within me, that such a conversation was an exception and not the rule.

    I was moved by the love in the fathers voice and the excitement in the voice of his son as they shared and exchanged the learning opportunity of this travel experience.

    I buried myself in my work and continued to my destination.

    The conference that weekend was wonderful, and I found it necessary to cancel my return flight and spend an extra night providing mentoring for one of the conference participants.

    Monday morning found me once again settling in, preparing for yet another cross country flight to my next conference.

    As I placed my bag in the overhead compartment I glanced behind me and low and behold, a few rows back sat the same father and son duo. At that point I experienced that inner twinge, that prompt of the innate, that this was not just a coincidental happenstance.

    Once airborne and in a position to "move about the cabin" I took three Blue Ribbons from my briefcase and introduced myself to the father and his son. I explained how I had been sitting in front of them on the previous Thursday, and how moved I was by the love and obvious connectivity between a father and a son.

    I acknowledged the father for his attentive and loving leadership and dedication to his son. I then presented him with a Blue Ribbon and gave him two more and encouraged him to pass on this acknowledgement to two others who made a difference in his life.

    A part of me wanted to acknowledge his son as well, yet that inner prompting within, told me no.

    I returned to my seat and 'hunkered down' for the remainder of the flight.

    A few minutes later, I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder. I looked up from my laptop to see the brimming face of the young boy whose father I had acknowledged. He stood there before me wearing a Blue Ribbon placed proudly over his heart.

    His eyes were moist yet the beam on his face told me that the moisture was representative of an expression of joy and happiness.

    "Mr." he asked, "do you have any more of those Blue Ribbons? You see, my dad gave me a Blue Ribbon and told me how much he loved me and how proud he is of me. He told me how brave I am and how much I mean to him and how my being with him has made him strong. Then he gave me this Blue Ribbon." He pointed proudly to his heart and his Blue Ribbon.

    "Then he gave me the other Ribbon," he said, "and told me to give it to someone who has made a difference in my life."

    "Well Mr." he continued, "you see back there in the seats in front of my dad, the lady and the girl next to her? That's my mom and my sister. You see, a while back my dad and my mom decided to separate and were thinking about getting a divorce. My mom and sister went to live with my grandma and grandpa, and me and my dad stayed back home. We came out here last week to ask my mom to come home and see if we can make our family "work" again."

    "They said yes, and now we are going back home together as a family."

    "You see Mr., I only have one Blue Ribbon left to give away. I can't decide if I should give it to my mom or my sister. I have missed them so much, and I am so happy that they are coming back home with us. I sure would like to give them both a Blue Ribbon. Do you have one more?"

    I could hardly contain my tears. I reached into my brief case and took out the remainder of the package of 100 Blue Ribbons I had with me. I handed them to the young man and asked him to make sure that he made sure to spread his love to all those who made a difference to him.

    He graciously accepted these ribbons and returned to acknowledge his mother and sister.

    A little while later as I glanced up from my work, I noticed the flight attendant moving past me, with a Blue Ribbon placed over her heart and saw protruding from the pocket of her uniform vest, two more Blue Ribbons. I knew then that the rest of the Ribbons were in good hands.

    As I turned around to find the young boy, I discovered him sitting between his father and his mother and his little sister sitting on daddy's lap. All of them were wearing Blue Ribbons.

    As our eyes met, there was a most loving and gracious nod of love and appreciation.

    The enigmatic nature of this simple Blue Ribbon, once again promoting love and all that is pure and wonderful.  At that point I realized that the success of the conference wasn't the only Business God had planned for this trip.

    Thank you for prompting me to once again recognize the depth of gratitude I feel for all that is loving and wonderful in my life. 

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    Randy Pausch: Last Lecture

    "The brick walls are not there to keep us out; the brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something."

    ~Randy Pausch

    Randy Pausch was 47 years old when he died from pancreatic cancer. He was, as the Independent of London put it, "the dying man who taught America how to live." His book, The Last Lecture, is an international best-seller and it offers many wonderful lessons about life.

    Randy Pausch's "last lecture" was delivered in September 2007, at Carnegie Mellon University, where he taught computer science. The lecture began with him standing before a screen beaming down chilling CT images of tumors in his liver, under the title...The Elephant in the Room. He then said to a stunned audience, "I have about 6 months to live." He said, "I'm really in good shape, probably better shape than most of you," ... dropping to the floor to do push-ups.

    He went on to say, "I'm dying and I'm having fun, and I'm going to keep having fun every day I have left." He talked about his childhood dreams and what they had taught him about life. He said, "If you live your life the right way, the karma will take care of itself...your dreams will come to you."

    Randy Pausch really was a dying man who has taught America how to live.

    He died on July 25, 2008, but his wisdom, his passion, and his attitude are lasting sources of inspiration for all of us.

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    Restroom Conversations..

    Contributed by: kagalwalashabbir @ yahoo.co.in

    I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying:   "Hi, how are you?"

    I'm not the type to start a conversation in the men's restroom but I don't know what got into me, so I answered, somewhat embarrassed, "Doin' just fine!"

    And the other guy says: "So what are you up to?"

    What kind of question is that?  At that point, I'm thinking this is too bizarre so I say:  "Uhhh, I'm like you, just traveling!"

    At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can when I hear another question.  "Can I come over?"

    Ok, this question is just too weird for me but I figured I could just be polite and end the conversation.  I tell him, "No........I'm a little busy right now!!!"

    Then I hear the guy say nervously...

    "Listen, I'll have to call you back.  There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!!!"

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  • How to Make A Baby

    Contributed by: kagalwalashabbir @ yahoo.co.in

    The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife. Jo, goodbye and said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon.'

    Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. 'Good morning, Ma'am', he said, 'I've come to...'

    'Oh, no need to explain,' Jo cut in, embarrassed, 'I've been expecting you.'

    'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?'

    'Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat'.

    After a moment she asked, blushing, 'Well, where do we start?'

    'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there.'

    'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!'

    'Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.'

    'My, that's a lot!', gasped Jo.

    'Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be In and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that.'

    'Don't I know it,' said Jo quietly.

    The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. 'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said.

    'Oh, my word!' Jo exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

    'And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with.'

    'She was difficult?' asked Jo.

    'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look'

    'Four and five deep?' said Jo, her eyes wide with amazement.

    'Yes', the photographer replied. 'And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots.

    Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in.'

    Jo leaned forward. 'Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?'

    'It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away.'

    'Tripod?'

    'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand for very long.'

    Mrs. Smith fainted.....

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  • Lacks Teeth

    Contributed by: kagalwalashabbir @ yahoo.co.in

    An older couple was lying in bed one night. The husband was falling asleep, but the wife felt romantic and wanted to talk.

    She said, "You used to hold my hand when we were courting."

    Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second, and tried to get back to sleep. A few moments later she said, "Then you used to kiss me."

    Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep.

    Thirty seconds later she said. "Then you used to bite my neck.

    "Angrily, he threw back the bed clothes and got out of bed.

    "Where are you going ?" she asked.

    "To get my teeth!"

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    By kagalwalashabbir @ yahoo.co.in

    Mike was going to be married to Karen so his Father sat him down for a little chat.

    He said, 'Mike, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your Mother, and said, 'Here - try these on'.'

    She did and said, 'These are too big. I can't wear them.'

    I replied, 'Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will.'

    Ever since that night, we have never had any problems.

    'Hmmm,' said Mike. He thought that might be a good thing to try.

    On his honeymoon, Mike took off his pants and said to Karen,

    'Here - try these on...'

    She tried them on and said, 'These are too large. They don't fit me.'

    Mike said, 'Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will.

    I don't want you to ever forget that.'

    Then Karen took off her panties and handed them to Mike.

    She said, 'Here- you try on mine.'

    He did and said, 'I can't get into your panties.'

    Karen said, 'Exactly. And if you don't change your smart-ass attitude, you never will.

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    Bloating, belching, gas

    Bloating, belching, gas and gas pains can be embarrassing and uncomfortable. Here's what causes these signs and symptoms — and how you can prevent them.

    Bloating, burping and passing gas are natural and are usually caused by swallowed air or the breakdown of food through digestion. You may experience gas and gas pains only occasionally or repeatedly in a single day. When gas and gas pains interfere with your daily activities, it may be an indication of something serious. Find out how to reduce or avoid gas and gas pains, and when you may need to see your doctor.

    Bloating: Gas buildup in your stomach and intestines

    When gas doesn't pass through belching or flatulence, it can build up in the stomach and intestines and lead to bloating. Bloating is often accompanied by abdominal pain — either mild and dull or sharp and intense. Passing gas or having a bowel movement may relieve the pain.

    Bloating may be related to:

    ·         Eating fatty foods. Fat delays stomach emptying and can increase the sensation of fullness

    ·         Stress or anxiety

    ·         Smoking

    ·         A gastrointestinal infection, blockage or disease

    ·         Irritable bowel syndrome, a condition characterized by abdominal pain or cramping and changes in bowel function

    ·         Conditions such as celiac disease or lactose intolerance in which the intestines aren't able to digest and absorb certain components of food

    To reduce bloating, it may help to avoid or reduce the amount of gas-producing foods you eat. Many carbohydrates cause gas, and the following items are common culprits:

    ·         Baked beans

    ·         Broccoli

    ·         Brussels sprouts

    ·         Cabbage

    ·         Carbonated drinks

    ·         Cauliflower

    ·         Chewing gum

    ·         Fruits such as apples, peaches and pears

    ·         Hard candy

    ·         Lettuce

    Belching: Getting rid of excess air

    Belching or burping is your body's way of expelling excess air from your stomach. You may swallow excess air if you eat or drink too fast, talk while you eat, drink carbonated beverages or drink through a straw.

    Acid reflux or gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD) can have the same effect. If stomach acid backs up into your esophagus, you may swallow repeatedly to clear the material. This can lead to swallowing more air and further belching.

    Some people swallow air as a nervous habit — even when they're not eating or drinking. In other cases, chronic belching is related to inflammation of the stomach lining (gastritis), peptic ulcer disease or delayed stomach emptying (gastroparesis).

    You can reduce belching if you:

    ·         Eat and drink slowly. Taking your time can help you swallow less air. Also, avoid drinking through a straw.

    ·         Avoid carbonated drinks and beer. They release carbon dioxide gas.

    ·         Skip the gum and hard candy. When you chew gum or suck on hard candy, you swallow more often than normal. Part of what you're swallowing is air.

    ·         Don't smoke. When you inhale smoke, you also inhale and swallow air.

    ·         Check your dentures. Poorly fitting dentures can cause you to swallow excess air when you eat and drink.

    ·         Treat heartburn. For occasional, mild heartburn, over-the-counter antacids or other remedies may be helpful. GERD may require prescription-strength medication or other treatments.

    Flatulence: Gas buildup in the colon

    Intestinal gas is typically caused by the fermentation of undigested food, such as plant fiber, in the colon. Gas can also form when your digestive system doesn't completely break down certain components in foods, such as gluten or the sugar in dairy products and fruit.

    Other sources of intestinal gas may include:

    ·         Food residue in your colon

    ·         Changes in intestinal bacteria due to antibiotics or other medications

    ·         Carbohydrate malabsorption, which can upset the balance of helpful bacteria in your digestive system

    ·         Swallowed air that migrates to your colon

    ·         Constipation — the longer food waste remains in your colon, the more time it has to ferment

    ·         Sometimes, gas indicates a digestive disorder such as irritable bowel syndrome or lactose intolerance.

    To prevent excessive gas, it may help to:

    ·         Avoid the foods that affect you most. Common offenders include beans, peas, lentils, cabbage, onions, broccoli, cauliflower, bananas, raisins, whole-wheat bread, salads and carbonated drinks. If dairy products are a problem, try low-lactose or lactose-free varieties.

    ·         Eat fewer fatty foods. Fat slows digestion, giving food more time to ferment.

    ·         Temporarily cut back on high-fiber foods. Fiber aids digestion, but many high-fiber foods are also great gas producers. After a break, slowly add fiber back to your diet. Add products such as Beano to high-fiber foods to help reduce the amount of gas they produce.

    ·         Eat slowly. Try to make meals relaxed occasions. Eating when you're stressed or on the run can interfere with digestion.

    ·         Get moving. It may help to take a short walk after eating.

    ·         Try an over-the-counter remedy. Products such as Lactaid or Dairy Ease can help digest lactose. Products containing simethicone can break up the bubbles in gas.

    When to see your doctor

    Bouts of excess bloating, belching and gas often resolve on their own. Consult your doctor if your symptoms don't improve with changes in eating habits or you notice:

    ·         Diarrhea

    ·         Constipation

    ·         Nausea or vomiting

    ·         Weight loss

    ·         Abdominal or rectal pain

    ·         Persistent heartburn

    ·         Blood in stools

    ·         Fever

    These symptoms could signal an underlying digestive condition. Intestinal symptoms can be embarrassing — but don't let embarrassment keep you from seeking help. Treatment is available.

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